Incannerax What a waste of my time!!!

Thehibikiew Not even bad in a good way

Leoni Haney Yes, absolutely, there is fun to be had, as well as many, many things to go boom, all amid an atmospheric urban jungle.

Married Baby Just intense enough to provide a much-needed diversion, just lightweight enough to make you forget about it soon after it’s over. It’s not exactly “good,” per se, but it does what it sets out to do in terms of putting us on edge, which makes it … successful?

JohnHowardReid It wasn't long, of course, before imitators and spoofs of "Doctor No" appeared on the scene. One of the most promising of the spoofs, Dr Goldfoot and the Bikini Machine (1965) (available on a 10/10 M-G-M DVD) also turned out to be one of the most inept, thanks to clumsy, heavy-handed direction by out-of-his-element Norman Taurog and an over-strained script which forced Vincent Price to overplay his witless role. Admittedly, Fred Clark and Jack Mullaney contribute a few bright moments, and the bikini girls, led by Susan Hart are super-attractive, but all are eventually defeated by the weak inanities of a hastily-boiled script that totally fails to make an iota of sense even on its own comic strip level. True, the film has high spirits and a climax involving a footloose cable car. It also reputedly cost American International $1,000,000. I don't believe it! I'd say it was shot super-cheap using standing sets, back projection and obvious doubles.

CallEmLike ICem I like all kinds of humor, from witty and smart to silly and downright dumb. But not this dumb. This could make an infant throw their Binky at the screen in outrage.'Dr. Goldfoot and the Bikini Machine' is so ineptly executed from all angles, the mind boggles wondering where to start.Vincent Price is present, his usual mischievous self. You might have a chance to admire how he professionally slogs through this, if the movie didn't keep assailing your senses with such terribleness.Frankie Avalon fares not as well. His performance is so infuriatingly bad one would wonder how he ever got into movies. Much on the same wavelength in this titanium turkey is Dwayne Hickman. The two ally themselves against the evil Goldfoot. In one sequence, they get drunk then wake up with hangovers. This is acted and depicted so inanely, I got a headache watching it. Then the duo go on a lengthy search - for a new script or better agents, one hopes.The glimpses of gorgeous women in bikinis scarcely compensate for the waste-pile of a movie that surrounds them. The bright colors captured by the film stock are the only consistent thing to look forward to. It's enough to give drive-in movies a bad name, or make one grateful for long lines to buy popcorn.Have I made my opinion clear? If not, let me put it this way: it would have been a vast improvement if all the male leads had been played, in a multi-character performance involving disguises, by Jerry Lewis. I am not kidding.Playing his usual befuddled guy-character, Fred Clark does generate a couple laughs - bringing the grand total for the entire flick to 2. The theme song is pretty groovelicious - sung by the Supremes, with what sounds like the usual great Motown musicians backing them. Don't listen to it more than twice - it's infectious enough to make you go around singing it. Considering how deservedly forgotten this grade-Z time-waster is, this would only alienate you from your fellow man...

MARIO GAUCI I had watched this maligned film's even more notorious sequel, DR. GOLDFOOT AND THE GIRL BOMBS (1966) – a most incongruous assignment for Italian genre stylist Mario Bava! – on late-night TV…so, whatever its quality, I was obviously interested in the original. Unfortunately, the edition I acquired is panned–and-scanned and, just now, I realized that both films, along with the TV special THE WILD, WEIRD WORLD OF DR. GOLDFOOT (1965), are available as a package on DivX! Oh, well… Vincent Price was a fine actor but, whenever he turned to comedy, the horror icon was known to resort to ham – which he certainly does in this sci-fi comedy, mugging his way through the silly (if not entirely unamusing) proceedings. Of course, he's the mad scientist of the title – complete with Arabian-style golden shoes – who dispatches a number of female robots to lure wealthy bachelors into marriage so that they can eventually turn their assets over to them/him. Dwayne Hickman is one such target though, when a robot (engagingly played by luscious Susan Hart, who was actually the wife of top AIP executive James H. Nicholson) is sent out to find him, she actually bumps into Frankie Avalon first who, smitten with the girl, is determined to get to know her.Soon, he and Hickman join forces and land in Dr. Goldfoot's mansion; the latter is hindered, more often than helped, by an inept assistant but nevertheless manages to imprison Hickman in his dungeon. Frankie's partner and nemesis (respectively) from his "Beach Party" series of films, Annette Funicello and Harvey Lembeck, unexpectedly turn up here in cameos as an in-joke! – but we also get copious (albeit deliberate) use of footage from Roger Corman's Edgar Allan Poe adaptation of PIT AND THE PENDULUM (1961), which had starred Price himself. Similarly, the portraits of Dr. Goldfoot's ancestors bear the looks of the actor in a number of his earlier horror pictures for AIP! Fred Clark as Avalon's flustered uncle is typically good value: he's involved in a running gag which has him being hit by the door of his office and thrown clear across the room every time it's opened! For the record, the score (and title song) is very much of its time. The film, then, culminates in an elaborate car chase along the sloping streets of San Francisco (three years before the celebrated sequence in BULLITT [1968]) – before heralding an upcoming sequel which was to have been called THE GIRL IN THE GLASS BIKINI; actually, the craze for such cliff-hanging 'appetizers' begun by the James Bond films, was also adopted by the Matt Helm spy spoofs and even the "Beach Party" series itself!

Bogmeister MASTER PLAN: marry off rich bachelors to female robots and get rich. Of all the films attempting to capture the absurdity and success of the James Bond craze of the sixties, this one is the most ridiculous. This one combines the weird plots of the Bonders with some elements of the stupid beach movies and campy horror of the decade, complete with dungeons and threat of torture (genuinely if mildly amusing). It's an odd mix, to be sure. Then-popular teen idol Avalon, most famous for his beach blanket bingo pics, is an agent (number 00 & 1/2) of S.I.C. (Secret Intelligence Command), based out of my old hometown of San Francisco - nice location long shots and a focus on the winding Lombard street. He's a hapless dope who becomes involved with a femme fatale robot (Hart) accidentally. She's one of several creations originating from the warped brain of Goldfoot (Price), the mad doctor of the title. He's somewhat typical of a Bondian villain wannabe, but Price is best known for his mad scientist roles in typical horror films of that time, so he's kind of a combination of both. Though a mad genius in the comical sense, his goal is nothing more than making some bucks off his robots, so he's actually a futuristic pimp, running a wild & crazy con artist/prostitution ring.The plot is pretty amusing and Price hams it up shamelessly, mugging for the camera and even indulging in that cliché - the sinister mad chuckle. His assistant, Igor, is a complete idiot, a further parody of the mad scientist's aid from the "Frankenstein" movies, existing solely as an ego-boost for the mad scientist, to make him look even smarter - presumably why Goldfoot 'returned' him to life (see also the Luthor/Otis relationship from the "Superman" movies). How much a viewer likes any of this depends on how much patience one has for all the slapstick stunts and silly overplaying by the actors. Igor is the most extreme example, but everyone else also behaves like an idiot. The one surprise is actress Hart, who, besides being easy on the eye, proves to be quite talented, required to act with several different accents, besides other things. She virtually disappeared from the movie business soon after this, unfortunately. The entire premise of robotic babes, a commentary on male attitudes of that period, was repeated in later similar fare - "Some Girls Do" for example, not to mention the obvious "The Stepford Wives" in the seventies. Also note the use of musical sound FX in one scene from a couple of famous sci-fi pics of the fifties, "War of the Worlds" and "Forbidden Planet." Goldfoot and S.I.C. would return in the Italian "Dr.Goldfoot and the Girl Bombs" the following year. Hero:4 Villain:5 Femme Fatales:7 Henchmen:3 Fights:3 Stunts/Chases:4 Gadgets:5 Auto:4 Locations:6 Pace:5 overall:5