If You Only Knew

2000
5.5| 1h47m| NR| en
Details

A romantic comedy about a young man who fakes homosexuality to draw the interest of a woman. Instead she tries to help him find a date.

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Reviews

Huievest Instead, you get a movie that's enjoyable enough, but leaves you feeling like it could have been much, much more.
Patience Watson One of those movie experiences that is so good it makes you realize you've been grading everything else on a curve.
Ezmae Chang This is a small, humorous movie in some ways, but it has a huge heart. What a nice experience.
Cassandra Story: It's very simple but honestly that is fine.
dumitrescu-catalina The actors had no really story to work with. Not real comedy,not real romance,nothing. I would scratch my eyes out trying to watch it. It was a torture. who wrote the screenplay had a serious intellectual problem,the director appears having it also. I think that they were so bored doing this movie that they thought that making pauses ,long pauses between every line would add some kind of intensity to the script. It added only more torture.The pauses between every line,every scene are "chinese drop " torture. No emotions received by the viewer.Horrible waste of time.
David Atfield This horrendously bad piece of trash manages to be racist, sexist and homophobic all at once, while pretending to be terribly chic and sophisticated. Atrocious performances, a cliche ridden screenplay, and boring direction make this movie one to steer clear of. Two scenes were especially offensive - the one in which Schaech scrubs his tongue after being kissed by another man (could it really have been that gross), and the scene where Eastwood is kissed by Schaech's best friend, who is pretending to be Russian. After he leaves the room she exclaims "f**king foreigners"! So much for her being a cultured artist who dreams of living in Paris!?!Jonathon Schaech can be a likeable actor on screen, and is astonishingly good-looking. It's a shame he didn't learn more from working with cutting edge gay director Gregg Araki on an earlier film, and try to salvage this film from descending into a string of gay stereotypes and a mire of homophobia.
T S I loved this film! It works equally well as a romance and a comedy. Sam (Alison Eastwood) lives in her own apartment and is looking for a room mate. Parker Concorde (Johnathan Schaech), who falls in love with Sam from afar, would do anything to get closer to her and win her love. An opportunity arises, for Parker, when he finds out that Sam is looking for a new room mate. The only problem is that Sam only rents her spare room to gay men! Parker then leads Sam to believe that he is actually gay!! He then ends up becoming her new "gay" room mate. The words "low budget" are written all over this film. This, however, actually works to an advantage for the film as a whole. Too many "high budget" films end up focusing too much on the visual and too little on the plot. What ends up happening is that audiences are left with a pretty package that is empty inside. Where this film is concerned, this is not the case at all. In this case, the audience is given a film with plenty of plot, humor, and romance. Johnathan Schaech plays the role of Parker Concorde perfectly! This particular role, for him, is a bit of a balancing act; however, he pulls it off quite well. Parker is rather naive and nerdy, but he's also caring, considerate, and sensitive; still, he lacks the confidence to just "be himself". On the other hand, he's got the face and body of a Greek God!! Normally, these conflicting traits are not found all in one man. Johnathan Schaech is absolutely gorgeous!!! He manages to create the "perfect man" in the character of Parker Concorde. A man who is not only beautiful on the outside, but on the inside as well. With his glasses on, he is obviously meant to look a bit like a nerd; nevertheless, he is still quite handsome. Without his glasses, he looks like a fashion model (There are actually some scenes where, when caught at the right moment, Jonathan Schaech looks ABSOLUTELY PERFECT!!! He has, by far, the most gorgeous face and body ever caught on film!!!)!!! Are we to believe that he would ever have trouble attracting women? He would have a lot more trouble keeping them away!! Nevertheless, Parker is unaware of what a good catch he really is. Is this unrealistic? Of course not! Many beautiful men and women are actually in this same boat. This aspect of Parker's character is what sets the plot in motion, and makes it believable as well. Alison Eastwood gives a solid, yet subtle performance as the likeable, "gay friendly" Sam. Her character is a bit more worldly than Parker; she is nonetheless, a perfect match for him. The good chemistry, between both Alison Eastwood and Johnathan Schaech, makes it seem all the more clear that these two are meant to be together. Along for the ride is a strong and very funny supporting cast!! Watch for the scenes that include Parker's gay coworkers, his female militant boss, and his oversexed "straight" best friend. They're hysterical!! There are numerous scenes that I rewind and watch over and over and over!!! This is a definite must see!!! Don't miss this one!!!
Enrique Sanchez It's just a movie, folks. But it was a fun experience and I would recommend it to a few friends that like romantic comedy. The movie never pretended to be something else. It is a woman's movie - but - there is enough for guys to enjoy, too.