ReaderKenka Let's be realistic.

Konterr Brilliant and touching

Chirphymium It's entirely possible that sending the audience out feeling lousy was intentional

Billy Ollie Through painfully honest and emotional moments, the movie becomes irresistibly relatable

Rainey Dawn I guess the only 2 reasons they added this awful film to the Sci-Fi Classics 50-Pack was the word laser in the title and to throw something into the pack to make sure there are 50 films in the pack because this is not a Sci-Fi film. This is a stereotypical action B-film of the 1980s.The only drawing power to this one is Brandon Lee. It's not the story, it's not a great film, it's not anything but a terrible action B- film with Brandon Lee.I was hoping this was a kinda decent Sci-Fi -- but it's far from Sci-Fi and far from decent.1/10

Comeuppance Reviews Look at the above picture: Ernest Borgnine is IN the diamond. End of plot synopsis.This laughably and lovably inept movie is just out and out silly - so take that as a solid recommendation. One of our readers, Gap, suggested we review this movie, and we always try to listen to our followers. Brandon Lee is charming as the CIA agent/mercenary who is a master of disguise named Michael Gold. There is a 526-carat diamond at stake called the Verbeek (?) diamond which will enable whoever gets it to build a powerful laser to take over the world. Naturally many bad guys are after him as he tries to rescue Professor Braun (Borgnine) who has been kidnapped. His journey takes him from Cuba to the Namibian desert, with Braun's daughter Alissa (Monahan) in tow.There are inane action sequences involving shooting, blow-ups, guard tower falls, evil Germans, fruit cart chases and many other clichés, all done in what seems to be an unintentional cartoonish style. The "help the daughter find the kidnapped father" is a very American Ninja-style plot, and Ernest Borgnine's accent comes and goes. The unnamed song, which repeats many times throughout the film (plus all the nonsensical goofiness) reminded us of White Fire. The song is musically very reminiscent of "There's No Easy Way Out" and the singer sounds drunk. Apparently it was done by David Knopfler, and his husky, amazingly slurred singing makes Bob Dylan seem like someone with perfect diction.Laser Mission was done in the golden year of 1989. It was directed by BJ Davis, who has a long history in the stunt world. It has since fallen into the public domain and thus can be found in gas stations all over the world for about a dollar. If you see it, we strongly suggest you pick it up, as it is well worth that meager investment. Sure, the quality is blurry (even the SOUND is blurry) but it will provide entertainment and laughs. And isn't that what movies are all about? Laser Mission is a silly great time. We'd love to find more movies like this.for more insanity, please visit: comeuppancereviews.com

Hitchcoc It's as if someone said, "There have been lots of good spy movies made. Let's make one that isn't clever, isn't exciting, makes very little sense, and see if we can get people to go to it." I doubt that many did. When I saw our boy Chuck Bronson killing armies of people with one shot in all those Death Wish movies, I thought I had had enough. These people that are able to run around with weapons and kill people by shooting them out of tower, off roofs, and right in front of them, gets really tiring. It's not much different than a bunch of ten year old's playing war. Every shot finds its mark and no one can hit the broad side of a barn on the other side. Of course, their approach to combat is to run at the guy with the gun, holding your weapon to the side, and stop. Ernest Borgnine must have been really hard up for parts (remember, he was once an Academy Award winner). This isn't tongue in cheek fun (although they try to throw in a little humor). It's just abjectly tiresome. Find an old James Bond film.

manicgecko Brandon Lee actually made it to superstardom? Me thinks perhaps the only reason is that he was killed during the Crow. Laser Mission all but proves that there is no talent. Everybody in previous posts are raving about Lee's wit and one-liners - me I played "what stupid thing is the writer going to have Lee say next", and watch Lee blow any sense of timing, delivery, or style. Like Spiderman with a concussion he blows perfect chances to hit lame oneliners and they plop out like a lead fart. Saying that I actually liked the Boris and Natasha knockoffs who were supposed to be some Cuban/Russian/African soldiers of fortune, and really wished there were more shots of them.Unfortunately Lee was not the only rotten part of the movie. Borgnine must have had sunstroke to sign on, and Monihan - though giving us a couple nice shots of her flesh covered pasties, and her on again off again bra, couldn't act her way out of a tele-evangelists healing stage. And isn't Lee supposed to have been some sort of Kung Fu master? The martial arts in this flop consisted of synchronized falling down and explosions in the distance.The ending supposedly tied everything together after killing the psychotic bad guy about a jillion times. He deserved it for uncuffing Lee, me I would have placed a slug between Lee's eyes the first chance I got and saved the world the last 30 minutes of this flop.My suggestion - stick with watching Daddy Lee, and let Brandon's movies grow mildew in the dungeon's of the rankings.