Evil Tyrant
Warning, Spoilers! ...but it was somewhat entertaining if only for the cheesiness factor. The story is one of the most predictable I've seen in a long time and the swordfights (if you can call them that) are beyond laughable, but nevertheless, both me and my SO spent an otherwise bored saturday night watching this made-for-tv drivel. People have compared this movie to the excellent "The Princess Bride" but as a slightly jaded and cynical viewer, I'd have to argue that "The Princess Bride" is a lot more enjoyable in every single aspect (swordfights - I weep when I even compare the two, dialogue, plot, characters, and just overall silliness) when compared to this movie. This movie is simply not as clever as "The Princess Bride" nor does it aspire to be, which works in some ways for its own made-for-tv charm.
It's not horrendous by any means, but unless you're bored silly, I wouldn't rush out to see it either. My SO and I did get quite a few chuckles at several points in the movie, including the part where Froderick jumped in front of the Prince and saved his life (of course, the Sheriff happened to have only one arrow) and of course, the priceless "You got egg in your beard" line by Robin. Sure they had to use almost every medieval cliche in the book (including the worst kiss I've ever seen), but at least I didn't pay to watch it. The cast was overall mediocre and the plot would amuse those under 12 or anyone who is gullible enough to believe two guys can escape unnoticed in the night and find a canoe and THEN go across the English Channel without oars. Overall 4/10
Li-1
** out of ****I'm still not sold on the talent or starpower of Keira Knightley, the teenage British actress who took audiences by storm in 2003 by appearing in three critically acclaimed films, Bend it Like Beckham, Pirates of the Caribbean, and Love, Actually (of the three, I only found Beckham truly enjoyable). Princess of Thieves, apparently her first lead role (which she received probably because of her resemblance to Natalie Portman), is a decent outing as far as Disney television movies go (which are usually total crap), but it could have been one corker of a swashbuckler.The film tells the "what if" tale of Gwyn (Keira Knightley), the headstrong daughter of the Prince of Thieves himself, Robin Hood (Stuart Wilson). England is in a current reign of terror under the rule of Prince John (Jonathan Hyde), who has usurped the throne in his brother's absence due to the Crusades. News of the true King's imminent death arrives, leaving the throne in the hands of his son, Philip (Stephen Moyer). But Prince John and the Sheriff of Nottingham (Malcolm McDowell) conjure a plan to murder Philip, thus leaving the kingdom to John's hands.Robin Hood is assigned to escort Philip to safety in England, a task Gwyn is eager to take upon herself, but is promptly refused by her father. Upset, Gwyn dresses in masculine clothing and sets out to prove she has what it takes to match any man in battle. Matters are further complicated when she bumps into Philip, who poses as a valet to keep his true identity hidden and safe. Princess of Thieves is a TV movie, meaning I should probably go a little easier on it when it comes to aspects involving production values and special effects. But I can't ignore what I see, the movie clearly suffers from a lack of budget. Faraway shots of castles are obviously painted backgrounds and Prince John's army appears to consist of approximately two dozen individuals, not exactly a number that would set fear into the hearts of enemy soldiers.But when it comes to matters of acting and pure entertainment, the film is mostly on decent to solid foot, with the lead performers mostly impressive and the film moving at a fast and perfectly watchable pace. It's a movie you could gladly show your kids, who will probably adore it, and you yourself could also watch along without too much fidgeting. It's no surprise the best performances are delivered by seasoned thespians Malcolm McDowell and Stuart Wilson, but Keira Knightley is also competent as Gwyn, even if she remains an actress of very limited range. Still, she's got the rebellious, "kick ass chick" down. Knightley looks well over twenty in this picture, even though her actual age was probably closer to fifteen (wonder if she'll always look six years older than her real age) and I can't even begin to fathom how she could possibly pass for a boy when her looks are so feminine.It's unfortunate Knightley has no discernible romantic chemistry with lead Stephen Moyer, who's kinda bland at first, but is also occasionally charming as the handsome Prince Philip. Would you be surprised if I told you the movie includes a pointless subplot that's mired in teen movie cliché, with Gwyn's goofy-looking best friend sporting a crush on her even though her affections are for the prince. Would you also be surprised if the goofy best friend decided to take an arrow meant for the prince even though they were standing twenty feet away from each other, meaning the prince also had ample time to avoid this arrow he saw being aimed at him (lots of trees for him to hide behind)? To put it simply, they should have just excised this "love triangle" portion of the story entirely.As a swashbuckling adventure, Princess of Thieves is mostly a failure, with terribly choreographed battle scenes that are miniscule in scale. And because the movie is aimed at kids, the running time is well under ninety minutes, resulting in a rushed feeling throughout the film, particularly in the second half, with the Sheriff inexplicably in the rebels' hands in the blink of an eye (all this happening off screen) or the sudden appearance of the rebel army outside the enemy castle gates. There are still a handful of enjoyable moments within all the action, particularly the scenes involving archery. I especially liked the archery tournament, even if its outcome was blatantly predictable.But it's hard to ignore what a movie this could have been. With several more million dollars, larger and more convincing sets, full-blooded sword-clashing battles, and more intense romantic chemistry, this could have been one hell of a medieval adventure. But this is Disney, and any film made directly by this studio has obvious limits and expectations that have to be met, even if they hinder the simmering potential. Princess of Thieves is adequately disposable entertainment, but for a truly fun, funny, and romantic tale of a dashing prince falling for a beautiful commoner, see the far superior Ever After instead.
FrogtownFrogs
This is not one of the best TV movies I've ever seen, but it isn't hateful. The acting of Kiera Knightley was excellent, as was Stuart Wilson(Robin Hood) and Crispin Letts (Will Scarlett). Most of the others were pretty terrible, but that's forgiving. The script needed a bit of a touch up in places, but I don't think there is even one line of Robin's that I didn't like. "You have egg in your beard..." he says to Prince John.The one thing that really bothered me in this movie was the sword fights. They looked as if these extras coordinated them on their own, and had about an hour to practice. They have no speed, no feeling, and I imagine that Bob Anderson would have had a fit with these.Apart from the sword fighting (and that annoying Pope near the end...), nothing really bothered me about this movie. If you're looking for something to watch while holding the hand of your date, avoid this movie at all cost. If you're baby-sitting several kids, or are just bored out of your mind, this movie is flawless. Other than that, it seems to be just average. I've seen better, but I've seen much worse *cough*Attack of the Clones*cough*
