Tacticalin An absolute waste of money

PiraBit if their story seems completely bonkers, almost like a feverish work of fiction, you ain't heard nothing yet.

Brendon Jones It’s fine. It's literally the definition of a fine movie. You’ve seen it before, you know every beat and outcome before the characters even do. Only question is how much escapism you’re looking for.

Haven Kaycee It is encouraging that the film ends so strongly.Otherwise, it wouldn't have been a particularly memorable film

ingleseeuu This movie had a lot of potential in terms of script, etc. Unfortunately, just never gets an inertia going. Sad. Could have been a great little flick if casting had been better. DJ is just unbelievable as hero. A lot of the actors make the movie watchable, but too bad they were not able to get the rest of the project in order. Leaves the impression that the pdxn team just settled for mediocre.

Steve Pulaski It's amazing what I'll allow myself to watch, isn't it? The New Guy lies comfortably at the bottom of the barrel in terms of comedic teenage-fare. Its jokes are tired, its sight gags consistently unimpressive, and its story only elevated by the capable performance of DJ Qualls. You may remember him; that geeky, weird looking kid from Road Trip? His only starring role is unfortunately a film infested with dead end clichés and stale jokes so powerful they could taint a resume for decades.Qualls plays a high school senior named Dizzy, he's the stereotypical nerd who plays in a funk band and is treated with torment day in and day out at his high school. One day, Dizzy becomes involved in a little situation at school. Long story short, the poor guy's innocuous erection when talking to the pretty cheerleader leads to the librarian breaking his penis and sending him into a never-ending sea of embarrassment. For no real reason, loopier than all hell on prescription drugs, Dizzy intrudes on a church sermon at a local mall and is sent to prison.In prison, Dizzy meets Luther (Eddie Griffin), a man who understands the position the poor sap is in and wants to help him out. Dizzy winds up expelled from his old high school and winds up taking advice from Luther on how to be hip and cool. He gives him a makeover and renames him "Gil Harris," as he attends the school run by preppy girls and jocks, East Highland High. He quickly sets his sights on school cheerleader Danielle (Eliza Dushku), and quickly learns the only way to leave an impression is to be a jerk, so that's exactly what he does.One thing I truly need to admire about The New Guy is its lack of ambition. It's hard to find a film from the last few years that seems to be as inert and as lifeless as this one. From its drab title, to its cloyingly bland poster, contrived setup, stock characters that can be described and summed up in one word, unfathomable plot points, and a barrage of other things, it's almost as if the executives behind the picture told Columbia Pictures that they wanted to fund, produce, create, and distribute one of the most boring and listless examples of teenage banal.And they succeeded. Not only does the film make us sit through ninety-three tedious minutes of clichés and dead-ends, it also shortchanges the comic ability of its headlining actor, Eddie Griffin, by giving him virtually zero screen time. The man shows up at leisure, pulls off the ominous prisoner with little convincing charisma, and seems to appear and reappear at convenience.As stated before, DJ Qualls is an underrated talent, unfortunately confined to a supporting role more often than not or simply not recognized at all. This is tragic but also apparent when you have mediocre comedies existing on your resume in place of successful, possibly defining staples. If we were to compare The New Guy to, say, Stealing Harvard, you'd have to resort to the political method of picking the lesser of the two evils. If you compared it to the nineties icon Slacker, well, you'd be comparing art and trash.Starring: DJ Qualls, Eddie Griffin, Eliza Dushku, and Zooey Deschanel. Directed by: Ed Decter.

dunmore_ego So I'm totally writers-blocked one night while trying to finish a script. And I'm channel-surfing cable, my mind a blank, settling in to a long night of unproductivity, wondering fearfully - like everyone who experiences the steel wall of Writer's Block - how I'll ever be able to string words together again, when suddenly - THE NEW GUY. And words come.Ironically, there are not enough words in the virgin English tongue to describe the depths of stupidity THE NEW GUY plumbs. But it is not all bad. Well, the story, acting, directing, characters and production values are excrement - what saves the movie are its CAMEOS...Just before I can slap someone in frustration for the movie's putridness, and continue channel surfing - Gene Simmons.Yes, Gene Simmons of KISS as an evangelist preacher. From outa nowhere. Hilarious! Bad hairstyle only helping.Then Vanilla Ice as an overzealous bouncer. Funnier than his whole career combined.Henry Rollins as a prison warden. Square jaw, square job.Crue's Tommy Lee as a partygoer with a chick on each arm - now there's a stretch! Other cameos passim, topped off by none other than The Hoff - doing his Knight Rider as only he can.The bawdy cameos exist in another dimension of viewing pleasure, unrelated to director Ed Decter's and writer David Kendall's egregious film.THE NEW GUY is about utter dorkfish, Gil Harris (D.J. Qualls), who gets himself expelled from school (after a humiliating erection incident), so he can re-invent himself at another school as tough guy, Dizzy Harrison. It's meant to be a comedy. Too bad it isn't funny.I gotta get back to my script...--Review by Poffy The Cucumber (for Poffy's Movie Mania).

insomniac_rod DJ Qualls and Eliza Dushku make an "interesting" on-screen duo (and later couple) in this all American style comedy that is oriented for a teen audience.Sure, there are many clichés but you can forget about them in order to have a "decent" time.The movie is about a geeky, loser student that gets bullied all the time and could never get any girls. So he changes to another high school and invents himself a new cool, badass, groovy attitude that convinces everyone (except the popular male studs) that he's really cool.With his new attitude, he starts dating -sort of- the hottest cheerleader in school and that's just enough to make him change for bad because now he dismisses his old friends and his personality is now really annoying.Things get really ugly when the popular male students from his new college investigate about his past and discover that he was a terrible loser...Watch the rest and expect interesting things with a message.Eliza Dushku never looked this hot. I mean, her body is just spectacular and is enough reason to watch the movie. She's unbelievable hot believe me, if not, watch the scenes where she's trying on some skimpy, raunchy bikinis.DJ Qualls is really funny this time.Anyways watch this movie if you are in the mood for a predictable but funny teen comedy with some decent spoofs ("Patton" for example).