Matialth Good concept, poorly executed.

Dynamixor The performances transcend the film's tropes, grounding it in characters that feel more complete than this subgenre often produces.

ChicDragon It's a mild crowd pleaser for people who are exhausted by blockbusters.

Billy Ollie Through painfully honest and emotional moments, the movie becomes irresistibly relatable

gamay9 I am only reviewing this 1985 film because my son (who is now 44) saw it in 1987 when it was on Beta. Yes, Beta! He was only sixteen but liked it because the female lead 'had a cute ass.' Can one imagine what a sixteen year old would think of that film today?I saw this 'film' on 'Chiller' where they even cut foul language, like the 'F' word. In fact, they even cut 'shit,' which is often used on cable news today. That's because this network appeals to ten year old's who aren't supposed to know what 'shit' means. God forbid, if a ten year old heard the 'F' word. Of course, in today's society, a more lewd word would be the 'N' word, which kids can't touch unless they want to forfeit their Ivy League education. As far as the film itself is concerned, it ranks right down there with Kevin Spacey trying to imitate Bobby Darin in 'Beyond The Sea.' Just an old man trying to act out and calling it a homage to Darin, who was younger (37) when he died than Spacey was when he tried to play Bobby in his prime (if you think Spacey sounds like Darin, you don't know anything abut musical technology. I can have a studio make me sound like Neil Diamond). It's like Gary Busey trying to portray Buddy Holly. There are three wasted films, in a nutshell.

Scott LeBrun "The New Kids" is about average for this kind of film: competently if not stylishly made, routinely written, reasonably rousing for its big finish, and full of characters whom you can either like or loathe. And the sides are pretty well delineated: there are the good guys and there are the bad guys. And the bad guys do their able best to show you how much they deserve to die. Director Sean S. Cunningham, who despite efforts like this will always be best known as the original "Friday the 13th" guy, does a decent job, working from a script by future director Stephen Gyllenhaal (who also happens to be the father of Jake and Maggie G.). This is mostly a showcase for the younger crowd, with most of the adult cast relegated to minor roles. Certainly there is some capable production design present here, as well as a good music score by the always reliable Lalo Schifrin.Lori Loughlin ('Full House') and Shannon Presby (making his only feature film appearance here) play Abby and Loren MacWilliams, two nice, ordinary teens who end up living with their uncle Charlie (Eddie Jones, 'Lois & Clark') and Aunt Fay (Lucy Martin, "Cops and Robbers") in Florida. They become the targets of degenerate prick Eddie Dutra (James Spader, 'The Blacklist') and his gang of repulsive redneck flunkies. Things escalate until a bloody showdown at the amusement park that uncle Charlie operates.Cunningham does work with a pretty good cast here, also including Eric Stoltz as nice guy Mark, John Philbin ("The Return of the Living Dead"), the great (and too briefly seen) Tom Atkins ("Night of the Creeps") as Abby and Lorens' dad, Brad Sullivan ("The Untouchables") as Colonel Jenkins, and John D. LeMay, future star of the 'Friday the 13th' TV series, in a bit part. Loughlin and Presby do make their characters likable enough that you root for them, and Spader, Philbin and others are just so disagreeable that one just can't wait for them to get their comeuppance. Jones is engaging as a man who's a bit of a dreamer. There is a degree of 1980s style cheese to these proceedings (we get to hear the ditty "Stand Up" three times before this is over), but it's all pretty absorbing up to and including that climax. The final death is fitting and effective.If you're an animal lover, though, you may be taken aback by the actions of Dutra & gang.Seven out of 10.

TOMASBBloodhound After making this film and Tuff Turf in 1985, its a wonder James Spader ever had a long career in the business. Somewhere out there, there is a guy named "Shannon Presby" who can tell his family and friends that he was top-billed over Spader in a movie. I guess there are worse things to be remembered for. The New Kids is the story of a couple of army brats who have to move in with relatives in rural Florida after their parents are killed in the first couple minutes of the film. Its too bad it happens so quick, because the always reliable Tom Atkins plays the father. His role is so brief, you wonder if he even got time to sample the catering. Anyway, the two kids quickly draw the ire of a local redneck gang of teenagers after the pretty girl rebuffs their advances. The bulk of the film is just the rednecks vandalizing the amusement park run by the kids' uncle, and the kids overcoming the odds to fight back. Overall, its unspectacular.The film is directed by Sean S. Cunningham who never achieved the level of success he got with the original Friday the 13th ever again. Spader is a hoot as the local gang leader. His hair is bleached almost white, and he struggles dearly with a southern accent. Lori Laughlin is pretty, and gives a decent performance as the new girl. Shannon Presby as her brother is in good physical shape, but he has no screen presence at all. Its no wonder he never did much else. Eddie Jones as their uncle is quite colorful, and does a fine job as the proprietor of this tiny amusement park/gas station in the middle of the Florida wilderness. The amusement park is used as the location for the final showdown between the gang and the new kids, but it just isn't utilized all that well. It seems the deaths scenes are not graphic enough, or just not blocked very well. The film also loses points for multiple scenes of animal cruelty. Overall this is just a curiosity piece. Its a brainless exploitation vehicle, and its a wonder that Spader ever got serious work again. 4 of 10 stars.The Hound.

chow913 Too Depressing This is the type of film that's so depressing it's not even worth watching. It's like a VC Andrews novel without the fun of the incest. And this film would've been perfect for that.An apple pie teenage brother and sister are orphaned by a car wreck and move to Florida to live with their aunt and uncle whose lifelong dream is become carnies. Weird and financially irresponsible, but nice folks.At school the siblings are literally tormented at every possible moment by a gang of redneck bullies led by James Spader. Spader the most eloquent man on the planet as a redneck? It's memorably the worst casting since Australian Guy Pearce was cast as a redneck in 'Rules of Engagement.' The bullies do some of the worst harassing in film history such as beating up both brother and sister, killing their pets, vandalizing their family's car and carnival etcetera. All because they're the new kids.There's never really a scene where the family contacts the police and is denied help because Spader is the mayor's son or something like that. This made me feel less sorry for the family as the bullies could have gone to jail for these very serious crimes.The acting and production quality are average but there's nothing special, interesting, or entertaining about 'The New Kids' leave it alone.The only reason this film is even mentioned online today is that to die hard James Spader fans it's a classic. While I can see a Spader fan being amused for 5 minutes at him playing a redneck it hardly justifies a 90 minute bad movie.