Perry Kate Very very predictable, including the post credit scene !!!

Flyerplesys Perfectly adorable

SnoReptilePlenty Memorable, crazy movie

ScoobyMint Disappointment for a huge fan!

Joe Smith This movie has done the unthinkable.. it has matched up in almost every way, and likely surpassed in quality of dialogue, the steaming pile of cinematic vomit that is Things (1989). Don't take this as a discouraging statement, however. As a fan of the best/worst sort of B-movies like The Room and Troll 2, I know why some people would refuse to watch movies that belong in the crawlspace underneath the bottom of the barrel of cinema. For me, however, there's nothing quite like 90 minutes of absolute torture that I can spend years hating on afterwards. That's what motivates me to watch movies like Pocket Ninjas or the Star Wars Holiday Special. AND THEN there's movies like Things (1989) and Roller Blade Seven. It's hard to distinguish which is worse.. In Things (1989) you have dialogue spoken directly into a microphone to overdub the unlistenable quality of the camcorder's mic they bought from the local Ma & Pa Canadian electronics shop, making distance from the camera meaningless. All the voices sounded a foot away... And in Roller Blade Seven, you have scenes like getting into a car and driving off repeated a dozen times from different angles for absolutely no reason. In Things (1989) you have the most unappealing, impossible to identify with Canadian hick douchebags attempting to convey a storyline you can only pray leads to all of their deaths. And in Roller Blade Seven, you have characters that hardly speak with dialogue that (at least on my copy) was nearly impossible to understand acting out various events that seem potentially related, but not nearly close enough to string together a real sense of plot. I think Roller Blade seven ultimately takes the prize as worst movie I've ever watched. At least in Things (1989) there's enough dialogue and continuous flow of events (....sorta? not really, no.. but the plot sorta organizes itself eventually). Even after watching The Roller Blade Seven several times, I still don't know what was going on or why. I know there was a rescue mission, but that almost seemed to become unnecessary half way through the movie... and then a few times later in the movie where they suddenly started replaying that same footage again.. I don't know.. my brain hurts thinking about it. ^ See both of those movies, they will bring you years of therapy bills.. but they're two of my top 5 'I'm glad I watched that' movies..

smiley-32 I bought this movie from a market stall three years ago.. I gotta hand it to you when I sat down and watched it.. I thought 'OK! This is gonna be another big action B-movie..' Obviously I was wrong.. While watching this film.. I began to realise that this movie was taking me to another planet.. full of cr*p!I began to get really bored and fed up with this film.. Although I wanted to see was gonna happen in the end.. I really felt like it was really getting on my nerves..The people behind the film may've brought some well known name actors into this project.. But what were they thinking..? Even these actors couldn't save this film..At the end of the film.. I felt like this was a waste of money.. just buying this low life sucker of film for a small amount of money. A few months later, I sent the tape off to charity.. I didn't want to see it again..Sorry! But if you're thinking of watching a movie and then nodding off to sleep.. I can highly recommend it you.. Me? I'll rather go on Pro-Plus and watch something decent..!Disappointing 1 out of 10!

rowebot1 Much to the annoyance of past housemates, I enjoy watching B-grade films as well as the more commercial ones. So when a friend said he'd lend me his copy of "The Roller Blade Seven" and said how bad it was, I assumed he just didn't understand how good and bad B-grade film could be. To add to this, he bet me I couldn't watch the movie from start to finish, and that no one had been able to do it. Challenge accepted!Challenge failed! This movie is simply unwatchable. Having read a few of the other reviews of this movie, I know how they're trying to get the message across of just how abysmal this movie is. I don't think it can be done. One reviewer compared it to "Razor Blade Smile". This is also a bad movie, but an Oscar winner in comparison to the Roller Blade 7. No amount of panning or explanations can possibly get the message across of what this movie is actually like.This movie isn't just bad, it makes you angry. The copy that I watched is lucky to still be in one piece as an angry viewer was stopped mid stomp as he attempted to destroy the video so that no one else would ever have to be subjected to it again.If the chance comes around to see this movie, you should take it. It will make you appreciate every other movie you've ever watched so much more. To the people who made this movie, this simple question needs to be asked. Why? If you have some spare time and money, please don't use it to make films like this. It's paramount to mental abuse.

Cammie Kim I am always amused when anonymous reviewers attempt to criticizes actors and filmmakers here at IMDb.com. Most of the time I simply read the reviews and chuckle. But, in regard to this film I feel like I really need to put in my two cents because it seems that most of the reviewers are either missing the point of this film or simply want to attack the filmmakers (for whatever reason).First of all, I am grad film student at U.S.C. In one of my classes we went through the three films associated with the project, THE ROLLER BLADE SEVEN, RETURN OF THE ROLLER BLADE SEVEN, and LEGEND OF THE ROLLER BLADE SEVEN, frame by frame. So, I believe I know these films as well as anyone, expect maybe the filmmaker, could know them. And, 'Yes,' I have gone to both Scott Shaw's and Donald G. Jackson's websites and have read what they have had to say about these films. What I have to say is that they accomplished exactly what they set out to do; to make a completely nontraditional, art based, film. Now, I am not saying this is the greatest film every. What I am saying, however, is that the filmmakers used every element at their disposable to, as they put it, 'Push the envelope,' of film-making. If you look at what Donald G. Jackson and Scott Shaw accomplished in this film, with out any of the computer technology which became available after this film was made, they did one hell of a great job. The camera work is great, the editing is great, the story line, (or lack of one), is also great. What I think they really accomplished is to be the first to bring an MTV style of edit to a full length feature film. Or, three in this case.Not only are these films visually inspirational, but they brought together a great cast. I mean look at the acting careers of Karen Black, Don Stroud, and William Smith. If actors of that caliber embraced this film, how is a person who has no background in either acting or film-making qualified to criticize it. I mean you may not like Indy Art Films, but a Scott Shaw says on his website, 'You may not like the art of Picasso but you can not say it is not art!'There are a lot of reviewers who claim they could make a better film. As I always say to people who make this claim, 'Let's see it.' I briefly met both Scott Shaw and Donald G. Jackson when they gave a lecture at the DGA, Director's Guild of America, a couple of years ago. They were both very nice men and have held true to their ideal of pushing the boundaries of traditional film-making. I believe they are both an inspiration and the nonsensical criticism of this film should cease. People should open their eyes and see this movie for what it is, an inspiration to Indy Filmmaker that you can make a nontraditional film and push the boundaries of the accepted and the expected.