Robert Joyner
The plot isn't so bad, but the pace of storytelling is too slow which makes people bored. Certain moments are so obvious and unnecessary for the main plot. I would've fast-forwarded those moments if it was an online streaming. The ending looks like implying a sequel, not sure if this movie will get one
Teddie Blake
The movie turns out to be a little better than the average. Starting from a romantic formula often seen in the cinema, it ends in the most predictable (and somewhat bland) way.
Micah Lloyd
Excellent characters with emotional depth. My wife, daughter and granddaughter all enjoyed it...and me, too! Very good movie! You won't be disappointed.
Janae Milner
Easily the biggest piece of Right wing non sense propaganda I ever saw.
O2D
You would think a movie with this many hilarious actors would be side splittingly funny. You would be wrong. While it's not a bad movie, you would probably not realize that it's a comedy if someone else hadn't told you. It's no surprise that someone who is a huge fan of Cheech & Chong and Nigel Planer has never heard of this until today. If you like those guys or Monty Python you will enjoy this movie. If you want some hard laughs, look elsewhere.
The_Film_Cricket
There aren't enough pronouns in the world to adequately describe how insuffereable "Yellowbeard" really is. It has no laughs. Not one. None. Nada. Bupkis. Zip. Zero. Not even a smile. The best this movie can muster is stone-faced indifference. The movie begins, actors move around, there are sets, there are costumes, things happen and eventually there are closing credits. Not one scene is the slightest bit interesting. An hour after you've seen it, you've forgotten it. A week after you've seen it, you can't remember the title. As a comedy, it's a dead zone. "Sophie's Choice" had more comic zeal.Let me give you an example of the comedy at work here. There's scene aboard The Spanish Main, in which the captain (Tommy Chong, sporting a lisp) rummages through his newfound treasure, repeating "I'm the wealthiest person in the world! I'm the wealthiest person in the world!" He tells his first mate (Cheech Marin) that he intends to keep the treasure rather than turn it over to the king. Just to make sure that his second-in-command doesn't squeal, the captain orders him to bang his head on the floor until further notice. The first mate does so until a long time has passed and he looks up and notices that the captain has fallen asleep. That scene is actually worse than I've described it.That's the spirit of this movie. The jokes fall like stones. There's no structure or energy to it at all. If it has any value at all it proves, at least, that you can't just throw funny people into period costumes and expect comic gold. They need good dialogue, situations, and interesting characters. The approach here begins and ends with the idea that it's a comic parody of pirate movies. That's not enough. Pirate movies are so bizarre in and of themselves that they seem to rise above parody.The story is so innocuous that it is hardly worth the effort, but for completion sake here goes: In 17th century England, the dreaded pirated Yellowbeard (Graham Chapman, in a blond afro wig) is sent to prison for 20 years for his evil deeds. Once his sentence is up he is given 140 more, so he escapes and goes looking for his loot. That leads to all manner of characters running here and there trying to be the first to find it. Unknown to Yellowbeard, he now as a son. Unknown to everyone, the map to the treasure is tattooed on his scalp. Late in the film there's a story element that resembles "Mutiny on the Bounty," but that scene is paced so slowly that you feel as if you're watchiing amateur night at the Rotary club. Even"Yellowbeard" himself doesn't work. Chapman is a fine comedian but Yellowbeard, as a character, is more irritating than threatening. He disappears for large chunks of the movie and you don't miss him when he's gone.That's pretty much all you need to know. And it's probably funnier describing it then it is watching it. It's a pretty sad experience watching the best comics around doing scene after scene of what amounts to comic drywall. The cast includes some of the members of the Monty Python troup: John Cleese, Eric Idle, Graham Chapman; Most of the supporting cast of "Young Frankenstein": Peter Boyle, Marty Feldman, Madeline Kahn, Kenneth Mars. Then there's Cheech and Chong, James Mason, Spike Milligan, Peter Cook, Bernard Fox, David Bowie, Susanna York, Peter Bull. Yet, it all goes horribly wrong because these people are expected to simply make things happen. They wear garish period costumes and walk around on period sets, and yet nothing of any interest happens. Nothing.All through this film, I kept thinking of the opening of "Monty Python's The Meaning of Life" which features a 17-minute sketch involving a group of elderly office clerks from a small accounting firm rebelling against their corporate masters. The commandeer their office building and run it down the financial district like a pirate ship, raiding and taking over other corporations. That scene had bite. It had wit. And we hadn't seen it before. There's nothing like that in "Yellowbeard." This movie is seen, heard and quickly forgotten.1/2 (of four)
Rodrigo Amaro
John Cleese claims this was the worst film he has ever been. I don't know when was the last time he ever quote that but I respectfully disagree now that I've seen the remake of "The Day the Earth Stood Still" (ironically he was the best thing in it). But on the other hand I can't and won't go with the audience who says this one of the greatest comedies of all time. It's a good and a quite funny comedy and that's it. Just take a look at the cast and you know this could've been the greatest comedy from the 1980's and one of the most spectacular ever filmed."Yellowbeard" has the Monty Python team (Graham Chapman, Eric Idle and John Cleese, in fact) plus Cheech and Chong, plus Mel Brooks team (Marty Feldman, Madeline Kahn, Kenneth Mars, Peter Boyle) and names like James Mason, Martin Hewitt and a cameo by David Bowie (really tough to find him). Amazing, right? This wild bunch is united here in a pirate movie about a famous pirate named Yellowbeard (Chapman) and his struggle to put his hands on a treasure he hid several years ago. And now, other pirates, kings, Yellowbeard's wife and son and other clumsy characters are on the run to get this treasure.Several comedy teams are here but the humor selected here was the classic Python somewhat contained, very undemonstrative, not much of what we loved to see in "The Life of Brian" or "The Meaning of Life". It's less anarchic, less revolutionary, not much striking as the group tended to be. It's just an goofy pirate story with no social/political jokes.I'm not saying you can't have fun with this but it's less than what it's supposed to be expected with a cast like this. There are plenty of good moments here like Feldman's exchange of lines with Boyle about the whereabouts of Yellowbeard: "I was following him but I thought I was being followed, do you follow me?" or Yellowbeard's scheme to find the buried treasure in the sand: "Stagger, stagger, crawl, roll..." That is a good way to describe the film in a few dull moments when there's many attempts of delivering a joke that ends up being not funny. On a really sad note this was the final film of Graham Chapman, Peter Bull and Marty Feldman (who died on the set before the film's being completed and what's even sadder is that his character's death was terribly well-made, you can really see that a stand-in was used to replace him). Not much the kind of project you want it to be their last. In times when "Pirates of the Caribbean" are the latest and hottest thing to see but a little bit excessive in its development and big budget, it's nice to look back at a good comedy with a notable cast that can bring almost the same level of hilarious and adventurous moments. 6/10
Python504
When 'Yellowbeard' was first released to the public in 1983, it was greatly attacked the film. From what the critics where saying about this film, one would think this was the worse film in creation. Nothing couldn't be farther from the truth, it's actually pretty enjoyable. The movie has probably aged pretty well from being a hated flop to a cult classic.The movies plot is pretty simple. It tell the story of the most-feared pirate in history Yellowbeard (Graham Chapman, 'Monty Python') is taken out of prison after 20 years (for tax evasion). Before he escapes, he is told by his wife (Madeline Kahn, 'Blazing Saddles') that he is the father of a boy named Dan. He also learns that the only map in existence to his sought after treasure is tattooed to Dan's head. There they, along with others, embark on a quest to find the treasure.The movie has a wonderful cast, along with a witty (yet non hilarious) screenplay make this an enjoyable pirate adventure.(Note: while 'PG', this movie contains much nudity, and a ship-load of raping jokes.)